What it’s like to have a stroke at 29.

  I have always been extremely house proud, thinking about it, it may even relate to my anxiety, mess and disorder make it very hard for me to think straight and be collected.  Obviously, when I first became unwell, I wasn't able to keep on top of the house and the things that needed to be done, simply because I just couldn't move from one room to another without someone holding me.  Once I had learnt how to get around again I began to set myself small challenges around the house in the areas I could access and jobs I could do sitting on a chair or the floor. I took before and after pictures, not to show anyone but for my own benefit really. I decided after a few months of this that I wanted to create a home account on Instagram, I had followed most of the big accounts for a long time before becoming unwell, such as Mrs Hinch and Stacey Soloman and had found them to be reassuring and somewhat comforting. So in September 2020 I created Cleaning_and_Dreaming. Within a month...

One thing I am extremely proud of my post stroke self for is the way I have been able to adapt and overcome obstacles rather than just say 'I can't'.  I will still go for a 'girly day' such as shopping with a friend; only now its one shop, maybe two, and a sit down, normally for a drink, then I can usually handle a third shop and then its home for a rest.  I have had to learn my body's new limitations and work around them. I'm not deluded enough to think I'll be signing up for the London Marathon (I wouldn't of been in a rush to do that before my stroke let's be honest) but I am confident that I will not have to miss out or turn down too many activities that I would previously have enjoyed.  I still keep on top of the housework, when I am motivated enough to, even if it does mean unloading the dishwasher using a perching stool instead of standing up and bending down. I can still prepare a meal, not brilliantly but that's not because of my str...

Up until recently Lee and I have lived somewhat comfortably, we are by no means wealthy but we both worked full time, Lee fortunately has a decent job that pays reasonably well but, as I mentioned before, my wage was pitiful in relation to the hours I worked, nevertheless,  we were able to eat out or have takeaways as often as we wanted to, never missed a night out, brought designer clothes, shoes and bags and nice cars etc. Remember I said we don't have children so we owe a lot of our disposable income to that.  That all changed when I got to 6 months post stroke; I received a letter from the council that employs me stating they wouldn't be paying Sick Pay after a certain date, which I knew was coming, I understood that was the protocol. This letter stated that I needed to present the attached form to DWP to 'claim benefits'.  Shortly after this, money from work stopped coming altogether. And I went from being a completely self sufficient, incredibly independent you...

Another thing no one warned me about post stroke was the fact that I would feel like I had completely and utterly lost the plot.  Now, I'm not blowing my own trumpet, but I have many years of training centred around mental health under my belt-*Toot Toot* -  it's something I am extremely interested in and passionate about. So when I felt my anxiety levels rising and saw the change in my character I knew immediately I needed to acknowledge it and do something to help myself.  So I began with the basics, breathing exercises, grounding myself, distraction techniques that kept my hands and mind occupied, journaling, talking about the way I felt to Lee and to my GPs, all the things that I would advise a young person to do if they were to come to me and say they felt anxious. But it didn't help me in the slightest.  I was so angry and so sad, all the time. I would lie awake at night worrying about every aspect of life that I could possibly worry about; from money and ...

  As soon as my diagnosis hit I was inundated with letters and calls for appointments with various doctors and specialists.  A stroke in someone so young raises red flags for things such as small holes in the heart which can allow clots to pass through and end up causing a stroke. So ultimately the hospital will do every test possible, cover every base, until they find something that may potentially show up as a reason for stroke.  Now, as I mentioned before, I've got a really irrational fear of hospitals and anything related to them, needles mainly. So this wasn't good news for me.  The first things I had done were simple things, I was fitted with a blood pressure monitor for 24 hours, after that I had a heart monitor for 7 days to check for an irregular heartbeat, I had endless blood tests, I had 2 echocardiograms, I had ultrasounds on my neck and chest...At one point I was visiting the hospital at least once a week for something or other.  However, in my case...

Now, at this point I could tell you how I breezed through recovery with my glass half full seize the day cheery mindset...but that would be a bare faced lie.  The first 6 months post stroke were some the most mentally and physically challenging of my life.  I was so angry, all the time. I wanted to scream, shout and throw things. But most of all, I wanted to stop needing help. Even before I my disability asking for help was something I struggled with on every level, be it at work, around the house or anywhere. It was my biggest weakness.  So I did the only thing I knew how to, I faked it, I pushed myself beyond my physical limits daily, which often resulted in me causing injury or sleeping for 12 hours plus. I insisted I was fine whenever anyone asked. I took risks like taking myself off to the local shop, which would normally be a 5 minute walk, sometimes taking me 20 minutes or more. I refused to use a walking stick despite Occupational Health insisting I couldn't ...

Now as I mentioned in my last post, in the time between me having the stroke and me having my MRI scan, we went into lockdown. Covid had hit the UK and everything was different.  The chances of seeing a doctor face to face during this period were slim to none, some of the most serious life altering news I have ever had was given to me over the phone during this time. The NHS was doing everything it could to keep it's patients and staff as safe as possible.  Did this have a detrimental effect on my recovery? No. I don't think it did.  I said previously I'm terrified of hospitals, so the fact that I could access the advice and most of the care I needed without attending one was a bonus in my opinion. I know, sadly, that this wasn't the case for everyone that needed care, and that it caused great distress to terminally ill patients and their families, which I sympathise with on every level. But, for me, in that moment, it was better.  So for the first two months followi...

The 4th of March 2020 began like every other day. I woke up at 5.30am, washed, dressed and headed out the door ready to start my day, not knowing that when I came home later that evening life would never be the same again. I arrived at work, a local Primary School, at 7am and set up the hall ready to welcome the children that would be attending Breakfast Club that day. The session was busy as always, but uneventful, no drama, no issues, no angry parents or children having issues with each other. Nothing out of the ordinary at all. That was until 8.45 rolled around and I lost all feeling in my right side.  Initially, I thought my foot had gone numb because my boots were new and, to be frank, I've got fat feet, so my plan of action was to get to my classroom and remove my boots. I would have to work with bare feet and deal with it later. However, by the time I had walked the short distance from the hall to the classroom, my whole right side had gone numb, I couldn't hold my handb...

 Hi reader,  I’m new to this blogging malarkey, so you’ll have to bare with me as I fumble my way around and work things out here!  I thought I should introduce myself and explain what’s going on here first…  I’m Chantelle. I'm 31 and last year I had a stroke a month before my 30th birthday.  I live in the West Midlands in the UK with my partner, Lee and our 2 dogs Bella and Brian.  We don't have children as we are both challenged in that department.  I work in a Primary School as a Teaching Assistant and a Learning Mentor.  I've got two nieces who will always be babies to me, but in reality they are both very sassy teenagers.  My Mom and Dad are currently renovating a property in France; their dream is to open a bed and breakfast out there.  As we stand today, I have been 'off sick' for 15 months and I'm still no better than I was this time 12 months ago if I'm honest, I don't really know if 'better' is ever going to be a thing. Why am ...